Tuesday, May 06, 2008

東西文化思想衝突 / Cultural Differences

我住在楓葉國多年,適应了這边的生活方式和習慣,平時自己也不察覺東西文化思想衝突,但和香港的親戚朋友言談之間,就很明顯地表露了兩地之間对人事丶見解丶処世的分別程度。例如:

1. 很多時我說話就缺乏香港人的「婉轉」,我以為是開門見山,打開天窗說亮話,但对方則可能會感到我是拙拙迫人,不留面子,不留餘地。

2. 我注重談論事情的內容丶和消息資料的凖确性,每事都要經過「客覌」分析,之後才作一個主覌的結論。但似乎香港的個人獨立思想是很受群众思想影響,「意見」經過大众肯定後就可以變成不可否認丶鐵一般的「事實」,或甚至是無可推翻的「基本原則」。或許那就是個人主义(individualism)和集体主义(collectivism)的分別罷。

3. 楓葉國式的幽默丶戲弄丶取笑,很多時会被誤解為不尊敬或「兒戲」。但我也佷明白,這問題在北美社会之內也會因宗教丶階層丶教育及其它不同背景因素(social stratification)而發生。

4. 詢問他人意見之時,我很難分辨究竟对方是真的沒有意見,還是禮貌上的沒有意見。我問一句簡單的:『今晚出亍吃晚歺,還是在家煑食?』答曰:『是旦喇,乜都無所謂。』這是一個沒有答覆的答覆,令發問者感到無所適從。

5. 在歺館埋單結数之時,对方会說:『等我請啦!!!』那究竟是誠意的慷慨,還是禮貌上的回答?我又要不要回一句『唔好,我請啦!!!』演出循例式推推讓讓的活劇?

我不是針对或批評香港的親戚朋友,因為各地風土習俗不同,實在很難判斷是好是壞丶誰是誰非。客覌來說,以上的感想,由其是1和2,很可能只是我個人品性丶和心理作祟,無中生有!! 但3,4和5就真是屢見不鮮,在我來說,總是有點文化思想不能融合之感。

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(Updated 2008-12-18)

Link to Michelle's article: "文化差異/ Différence culturelle"
http://petiteinote.blogspot.com/2008/12/diffrence-culturelle.html

20 comments:

Chris said...

是的,在一個西方國家住下來,日子久了便會變成「XX華人」,行為和「XX白人」還是有點分別,而與其他國家的華人或正宗中國人更有顯著分別。

新鮮人 said...

東西文化習慣有別就一定的,
又無話邊個啱或唔啱嘅,
重點係多了解多習慣,
不要偏重自己的法就可以了,
求同存異嘛!

啤酒花™_J said...

一样的米养百样的人。。。

Keith said...

I kind of notice I have similar thoughts like yours--product of living in North America since teen. I did not really give it a thought that I am 美籍華人 until Chris brought it up, perhaps too busy of thinking about 華籍美人.

xiao zhu said...

你說的都是事實,但就是看了心裡總有點不舒服。

Haricot 微豆 said...

Chris:

多謝到訪:)

我曾問現任加拿大自由黨領袖(他当時是Minister of Intergovernmental Affairs),少数民族的allophones和法語人仕的francophone在加拿大社会否有政治利害衝突?他的答案是:"No, diversity enriches our dialogues." 如我在回覆Keith中說,不論分別是華人丶白人丶或其它種族丶宗教丶性別等,最重要是Social Cohesion 和 Citizenship.

Haricot 微豆 said...

新鮮人: 如果多D人有您咁樣嘅睇法(由其係「憤青」),天下太平矣!!

Haricot 微豆 said...

啤酒花™_J: That is one but not the only explanation of the differences.

Haricot 微豆 said...

Keith: I personally do not like the "hyphenated citizen" label (Chinese-Canadians, Chinese-Americans, etc) because it discourages social inclusiveness and creates ethnic enclaves. There have been questions raised from both sides of the "pond" about the relevance of multiculturalism and diversity in a post-911 society. I would submit that there are two important things to remember: (a) Social cohesion is key to fighting against home-grown terrorism; and (b) Citizenship means rights, privileges as well as responsibilities (权利与義務). On a personal level, each citizen should feel comfortable under his/her skin, which of course is intrinsically linked to our real and perceived relationships with other members and communities of the society.

Haricot 微豆 said...

xiao zhu: 正如我說,我意思不是批評任何人,最重要是明白異同,減少東西方誤解,摒除成見。

Keith said...

I don't see anything wrong with the term "Chinese American". When did it become political sensitive? What will you call the ethnic group of Chinese Americans anyway?

I was just joking about Chinese American and Chinese beauty. I suppose I got a lot more than I bargain for.

Ruth Tam said...

1. Once an English teacher analysed for us, Hong Kongers, why English people think Hong Kongers are too direct. I think this topic is really a matter of custom.

2. In Hong Kong, people usually know the principle. Just very often, they don't care. A friend of mine who's a native British living in Vancouver after living in Hong Kong for some time. He said, in Hong Kong, you can say whatever because people are too busy to care. In Canada, you need to be politically correct.

3. Definitely a cultural issue. Different people have different soft spots.

4. Again, Hong Kong people don't really care, unless one really really have a strong preference for either way.

5. I usually just say thank you unless I have planned before hand that I will pay for it.

新鮮人 said...

如果個個人諗法一樣就大件事了,
個世界會變得好悶架!
一樣米要養百樣人才有意思嘛!
打個比喻,
希望世界上多啲好人是很正常的,
但如果全部人都係好人,
這樣會不會很奇怪呢?
不過,我當然希望好人佔大多數啦! =)

Haricot 微豆 said...

Hi Keith: Don't get me wrong, I never have any problem seeing myself as someone with a Chinese background living in Canada and holding Canadian citizenship. (Please see my upcoming article on "Hyphenated Citizens").

Now, I have to admit I did miss your pun abt 「華籍美人」which is pretty funny XD. Okay Keith, one for the good guy !!

Haricot 微豆 said...

Ruth: Thank you for your five comments. I take it that "Hong Kong people don't really care" is neither good or bad.

Haricot 微豆 said...

新鮮兄言之有理!!

Ruth Tam said...

Every person has something he/she cares a lot, whether it's something trivial or important. While something maybe very important to one person, it can be something of no significance to another. "Hong Kong people don't really care" is just a description and of course nothing good or bad.

From my experience, Hong Kong people are very accomodative. You can also say we don't really a strong passion on something. You seldom see heated debate even the group of people have several totally contradictive views.

Haricot 微豆 said...

Ruth: Thank you for the clarification. Being very accommodative will most likely avoid many potential conflicts.

michelle said...

Haricot, thanks for the link !! Comments here are interesting as well as the post !!

Yes i believe "diversity enriches our dialogues". Sometimes It is not easy to handle due to the culture difference, but it is indeed interesting to a country, and to citizens. That is why i think we are lucky to be able to integrate into another culture (if we can), though sometimes we have to go thru frustration, solitude....

haha "Hong Kong people don't really care", i would take Ruth's "people are too busy to care", a feeling i have in hk.

Thanks again Haricot,

by the way i've added your link in my post ;)


good day!

Haricot 微豆 said...

Michelle: "Cultural difference" is definitely something we can all relate to. And, you are right, it is a challenge for many.

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